This girl makes me laugh so hard!! She is wonderful, and soooo good at entertaining herself while I am taking care of Sara.
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At the hospital, Emma was having a really hard time with the new adjustment. She kept saying that the baby was cute, but "Baby stays here- we go home." Since then, she has really come a long way. She loves the baby, and likes to help me burp her. She has had a few 'Pay Attention to MEEE!!!' tantrums- but most of them have been fairly warranted. This has been a big adjustment for me too, but we are helping each other along.
Sara has been the biggest help by being an incredibly easy baby. Actually, after talking to toher moms, it seems that she is just an average baby- but compared to Emma, Sara has been a DREAM!! She sleeps, she eats, she burps- and other messy things associated with babyhood, she gives us the cutest expressions with her beautiful blue eyes, and then she sleeps again. Most days she gives me 2-4 hours between feedings, while other days I only get an hour and a half- but Ross is always willing to help me when I get desperate enough for sleep to ask him to give her one of her supplemental bottles (which I should really be less prideful about and let him do more often, because he says he really enjoys holding and feeding and doing the daddy thing). There has been no colic, no reactions to anything that I eat, no huge binge eating, and then sleeping for hours and hours causing me to get overlaoded and painful, and- best of all- she lets me actually put her down during the day- and the night- and really most any time. I mean, I LOVE that Emma is such a good snuggler now, but when she was a baby, it got really hard to always have to hold her. Sara likes to be cuddled, but unlike Emma, she is happy to sleep in her crib or her swing. She is wonderful, and I am glad that Emma came first so that I could revel in the beauty that is freedom to type on a computer while my baby is sleeping in her swing.
I think Ross may be right with his blood type theory. Emma has my blood type- and although she looks more like Ross- she is very definitely my child. She is full of energy and OCD tendencies. She loves her books and has got some great rhythm when she dances. She is stubborn and bossy and high strung- and pretty much a little miniature of me. Sara has Ross's blood type, and already she is proving to be laid back, relaxed and happy-go-lucky.
I love my family, and I am very grateful and happy to be where I am in my life. I have been fighting the demon of Post-Partum- Depression, but I am trying to stay positive and honest about it. It is easier to deal with it by putting it out there in the open so that I don't have to hide it away and be ashamed of it (which I am- but am trying not to be.) I guess the end to this random and rambling post will be a request for any advice on dealing with this depression issue non-medically. I really am happy and grateful- but I think exhaustion lets that little demon find a crack to sneak on in and attack when I least expect it. Any ideas on combatting this new element in my life will be very appreciated.
4 comments:
I had post partum depression after I had Abby, but I didn't do anything for it. I didn't realize thats what it was until I was past it, and looking back I was like "Oh, yeah, I did have it!"
So sorry I can't offer any advice because I dont know what would have helped me during that time, but it did go away on it's own.
I think it was probably a lot to do with exhaustion over no sleep, and feedings, taking care of Hannah (she was only 16 months at the time and not walking yet.) and being disgusted by my post baby body. It was also the middle of winter (Well, November when I had her) so we were just cooped up inside with it being cold and yucky out. I think it got a lot better once Abby started sleeping through the night and Hannah got more and more independent and could play by herself and help me with Abby.
Oh, I forgot, I was also not eating very healthily at the time, I think that can also have an effect on moods and emotions, etc.
I think it's normal to get "baby blues" after having a baby, and anyone who says they didn't must be lying. It is a huge adjustment, especailly when you have a child already. I hope your goes away on it's own! Its definetly not fun to be going through even if it is normal. I think if it gets severe then it would need medical attention thouhg, but just mild and I think it sould be fine.
Sorry I'm not much help.
Know that I'm thinking about you and wishing you the best though!
Oh, how is Emma's potty training going?
Hannah refuses to go! I think it's a control thing for her, she knows she can control it and I can't so she's keeping that control a little longer until she is ready.
Its frustrating though! Maybe I'll be potty training both girls this fall, but I sure hope it doesnt take that long for Hannah!
Eat well & excersize even just a short walk will do you wonders, not to mention get you out of the house. They have shown that a good diet and regular excersize work better to fight depression than any drug on the market. I know that it is cold, but you can wrap up Sara & bundle up Emma and take them with you or while Sara is napping and Ross is home you could go by yourself for a short walk. Talk about it with other moms that have been there, so you don't get to feeling like you are the only one, being open about a problem often is enough to keep it from becoming a bigger problem & even can help it go away. & Lastly if you feel like crying do, they have prove that when you cry you release the hormones in you body that cause tension and help them go away, one of the reasons they think women live longer and aren't as prone to stress related illnesses (heart problems) is because we cry more which releases the hormone instead of having it build up in our body. I hope this helps & if you ever need someone to talk to feel free to call or write me.
I wish I had advice to help. Just know you are loved.
I agree with Sophia...especially about the exercise! I am going through a similar depression with not being able to get pregnant, and exercise has kept me soooo much happier. I don't break down as much and I am able to make myself happier much more easily.
I also find that if I get ready for the day at some point, so that I don't feel frumpy or "blah" that it helps my mood. Also, Sophias advice on crying is very true!
~Becca
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