Friday, October 19, 2007

This is a little survey I saw on Tracie's blog. I have never been one to pass up a good surveying opportunity.

What is his name? Ross Erwin Goodman (if he ever sees this, he will be mad that I revealed his middle name)
How long have you been together? We have been married for 3 years, one month, 25 days, 1 hour and 4 minutes.
How long did you date? We started dating in November 2003, and got engaged May 17, 2004. I would have a more detailed timeline here- but I really can't remember the exact date of that first kiss. That is sooooo not like me!
How old is he? 25 years, one month, and 23 days
Who eats more? Ross- although I am catching up while I am pregnant.
Who said I love you first? I did. He waited more than a month to say it back- but I didn't expect him to even say it that soon. That was a confusing time for both of us, but some things just can't stay bottled up.
Who is taller? Ross- by quite a bit.
Who sings better? I do- by far! Of all the things I love about Ross, one thing that almost led to our demise was that he has no musical inclination whatsoever. That was a hard pill for me to swallow. Music is a HUGE part of my life. I have learned to be content with the fact that Ross really appreciates my talents in that area, and he is very supportive of me encouraging our children to pursue musical talents.
Who is smarter? That is a loaded question there! I am going to go with the safe answer that we are both very smart in our own areas.
Whose temper is worse? Mine- no contest!
Who does the laundry? I do. I have a system, and when Ross tries to 'help' it usually just stresses me out.
Who does the dishes? I usually do. When Ross wants to be sweet, he will do them for me. He is nice like that!
Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? I do- if you mean when you are laying in it looking at the ceiling. The only reason for this is that I have to have the side with the alarm clock, because Ross won't hear it.
Who pays the bills? Ross pays all of them except for one. I have a credit card that is all mine that I use to pay for presents for Ross. If I don't do it that way, he always sees where I purchased them, and how much I paid for them. I pay the bills on that account.
Who mows the lawn? Well, we don't have one- but when we do get one it will be all Ross!!
Who cooks dinner? I do.
Who drives when you are together? Ross. There was 6 months there where I had to drive everwhere because Ross had to go 6 months seizure free before he could drive again. We were both pretty excited for that time to be up! Ross can be quite the back-seat driver!
Who is more stubborn? Me. I am totally fine with admitting that now.
Who is the first to admit when they are wrong? We are both pretty good about that- but I think Ross is better. I chalk that up to me being more stubborn.
Whose parents do you see the most? Mine. Ross's parents live in California, so we only get to see them about twice a year at most.
Who kissed who first? Ross- that saga is all in a previous post.
Who asked who out? Ross.
Who proposed? Ross.
Who is more sensitive? I am. Not only am I a girl and, therefore, more apt to being sensitive- but I am also one of the most emotional girls I have ever met. I am also one of those emotional people who are ashamed of how emotional they are. This means that I bottle up all of that emotion and sensitivity. Poor Ross is usually the one who has to deal with the giant mess that occurs when all of that emotional crap comes spewing out of the bottle. However, I could argue that if he didn't want to deal with all of it, he could just stop provoking the breaking of said bottle! :)
Who has more friends? Neither of us have very many, but I think I keep in contact with a lot more than he does (thank you facebook)- so probably me.
Who wears the pants in the family? Ross does. He lets me try them on sometimes- but I think we both prefer it when he has them.

Friday, October 12, 2007

OK- I know this is a little out of order, but for some reason, I have been thinking a lot about when Emma was born. I don't know if it is just because I am pregnant, but I have been having a lot of dreams about that day, and when my mind wanders off at work- it usually finds itself among some distant thoughts of my little baby Emma on the first day we met. Anyway, I decided to write a little bit about it since it is on my mind, and since I haven't ever really written about it.

Now, part of the reason I haven't ever written about it is because I don't really like to talk about it. It was a wonderful day with so much joy- but Ross was not there, and that will forever be a little heart breaking to me. He wanted to be- we both DESPERATELY wanted him to be, but it just didn't seem to be in the cards for us. It was so hard for me to hold OUR new little angel and know that Ross would not be able to have those same feelings for her until he could get on out here. It was a weird feeling to be a single mom (that is how I was classified in the psychology section of my maternity folder).

Anyway- on with the day. During my entire pregnancy with her, Emma was a little whirlwind in the womb. All of her ultrasounds showed her swimming and kicking andwaving like crazy! At about 18 weeks I actually started to feel her moving, and she never stopped. There was always some kind of movement, and that was a lot of fun for me. Well, about 2 days before she was born (it was a Saturday) she stopped moving. This really worried me, because it was so rare for her to ever be still. After about 3 hours of only feeling 2 or three feeble kicks, I had my mom take me to the hospital. They did a heart-rate test on me and the baby and said that everything looked OK. I wasn't buying it. I KNEW that something was wrong. Well, before the nurses (the dumb jerks who just wanted to get me out of there since I was the only patient there) could kick me out they had to have a doctor come and check me out. Well, it just so happens that the on-call doctor was no other than my OBGYN, Dr. Wayne Young. He looked at the tests and said everything looked good- but I stopped him and said, "Doctor, there is something not right here. Are there any other tests you can do." He said that he trusted my instincts, but really didn't think that anything was of immediate concern. He did however schedule an ultrasound for me on the following Monday, and told me to come in if I had any pains, or if she went more than 5 hours without moving at all.

On Monday morning he took the ultrasound and found that her umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. It wasn't terribly serious, but it did mean that they had to do a C-Section, and soon. He had me take a stress test for me and the baby, and when it showed that Emma's heart rate had dropped since being in there on Saturday, he scheduled the C-Section for later that day.

My dad took work off (something rare for him) and my mom skipped her class at school that night (something rare for her) and all of my sisters found their way over to the hospital to be with me. My best freind even got someone to cover her shift at work so that she could be there as well. Over the next 2 days (I only stayed there 2 nights) I had A LOT of visitors and well-wishers coming to see me. One of the nurses asked me if I was lonely without Ross (a pretty dumb and pointless question if you ask me! What am I gonna say to that? "Oh no- I love having the love of my life gone for one of the most mometous times in our married lives. ) and one of the other nurses replied, "Good heavens- have you seen all of her visitors? The daddy would have just been in the way." I am very lucky to have so many friends and family members who love me so much. It was hard not having Ross there, but it was also nice to know that I was not being forgotten.

This is my mom trying out her new position of Grandma.

Aunt Heather

Aunt Caulene
The whole family all together. Ross and I were on the phone quite a bit that day!

My dad took these before I was even out of the O.R. He followed them down to the room where they clean off the gunk before they bring the babies to the proud mommies.

This was just before they wheeled me into the O.R. That nurse's name is Rayden, and she was FANTASTIC!!! She was one of my nurses when I went to the hospital last week, and she was just as amazing then too- she is VERY good at her job and she made me feel much less nervous about the whole thing.

Thursday, October 04, 2007

One night Emma discovered the pocket on Ross's dress shirt, and just thought it was the neatest idea to keep things you need in a convenient spot like that. Since then she has been putting things down her shirt. When we get her ready for bath time we usually find crayons and bracelets and sometimes a toothbrush. Well, she has taken this ingenius storage method to a new level! Her babysitter sent me this picture the other day. She said Emma got it just right so that she could lean down and take a sip without interrupting her game of organizing all of the building blocks (she is SOOO my kid!)

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

How it all Began

I have had to write this story out a couple of times over the last few days for some friends on Facebook- and I decided that it would be much easier to just post it here and send people to it. Maybe I will even get some more attention to my blogness that way. :)

OK- the saga between Ross and I is a long and confusing story- so I hope you are ready for this :) Ross and I met in an astronomy class at BYU-Idaho. He came in and sat down by me because (he told me later) he thought I had really pretty hair (it was down to my butt at that point). When he sat down there was like this instant connection. I felt totally comfortable with him (something totally uncahracteristc of this little wall flower!). Astonomy grew to be my favorite class every day because I knew that Ross and I would get to talk for an hour. After about a month of just chatting and laughing in class he asked me out on a date. I turned him down because I kind of liked him, and that scared me. I was in the process of planning my wedding with Eric Owens (he was on his mission at the time, but had only 7 months or so left.) Well, he asked a couple other times, and I finally said yes to 2 of them. On the second date he held my hand and we had a really great hug at the end which I am fairly certain would have been our first kiss- but then a big picture of Eric popped into my head, and I quickly thanked him and ran inside.

The next day in class I told him just how serious my missionary and I were. At that point he was interested in two girls- me, and another girl in his ward who was preparing to serve a mission. After our little chat in class that day, he decided it would probably be easier to keep her from going on a mission than to get me to "Dear John" Eric. So- we continued our talks in class (he ended up with a D in the class, because he really only came to see me- I got an A-) and became really close friends. About 4 months later we were both waiting for missionaries together. When Eric came home and that whole thing fell apart- it was one of the hardest times of my life. Ross really stepped in there as my best friend and helped me through it.

During this really hard time he was so wonderful that I started to fall for him, and I could tell that he was starting to fall for me. This scared both of us because I did not want to have someone as special to me as Ross as my rebound- and he was in love with another girl. He did not want to be my rebound from a 4 year relationship, and he was trying to stay in love with Erin (I think it is funny that we both waited for missionaries with names that are one letter off from each other). We both fought our feelings down and just stayed totally plutonic. After about 6 months of this, Ross asked me to a dance on campus- the day of. I was excited to go to formal with someone I could be totally comfortable with. I rushed around to try and borrow a dress and get my hair done and be all pretty. He took me to a great restaurant and we had a great time. When we got to the dance- the first slow song that played was my song- Lady in Red- which was even cooler because the only dress I could find to borrow was red- bright red! We danced and he held me closer than usual because the place was packed. At one point in the song when it says "I've never seen you lookin' so gorgeous as you do tonight. . ." he sang it and whispered in my ear that it was true. Then I looked at him to make some funny remark, but we caught each other's glance and there were butterflies all over!!! The rest of the night was just weird and exciting. He would hold my hand to lead me through crowds (something we always did in crowded places) but then he wouldn't let go afterwards. After the dance, neither of us wanted the night to end, so he took me back to my apartment where I changed, and we went walking- in 20 below zero weather, in some way cool fog. It was so romantic.

At the end of the night he dropped me off, but before he let me out of the car he said "OK- there is a song that has been running through my head all night, but I am afraid that if I act on it, I will lose my best friend, and I am not willing to compromise that." I asked him what song he was thinking of, and he said, "Something from The Little Mermaid." I then decided to be a little facetious and listed every song from the CD- he was suprised that I knew all of them- but then when I said "Kiss the Girl?" he asked if it would mess things up. I told him that it would not- but things would definitely change. So- we kissed, and from then on started dating.This whole dating mess was really hard because I went back home for winter semester. I was also trying to balance my roles of being Ross's best friend who was supporting him trhough missing his missionary (stupid hoe!!) and his girlfriend who was falling in love with someone who was in love with soemone else. We tried to take turns visiting each other, and things were fun- but so confusing. On Valentines Day he told me he loved me for the first time. He never told Erin about me- but she wrote him off in March. This meant that we were able to get much more serious, because one of our biggest obstacles was out of the way. We got so serious that it hit that point where you can either get married or break up. We broke up- but we both made a conscious effort to stay friends- which we did.

When I came back to school in the summer we hung out all the time- it was like we were dating, just not kissing. I kept waiting for him to realize how much he loved me and come crawling back. Afer a month of that crap I went out with a guy in my ward who had been asking me out. We really hit it off, and on our third date we kissed and I was sooo happy! I went to go tell my best friend about my new relationship- and was shocked when he was mad at me. He started telling me what a whore (yes- he used that word!! He was rally upset!) I was for kissing so soon, and just said some really nasty things. The fight got pretty heated- and I left that night thinking that I had lost my best friend, and I was heartbroken. I decided that it would be OK because Mark was such a great guy.

The next day I didn't go to my class because I had not slept much the night before. I stayed home in my PJ's and did some laundry. I was surprised when Ross called me. He said, "We need to talk- can you be ready in half an hour?" In my mind I was thinking "Oh great- he is just going to yell at me. I am going to make sure he sees what he gave up!" So I got all ready and I looked HOT!!! When he showed up he helped me into his truck and drove me out to this little spot in the middle of a potato field and he was grinning from ear to ear. He puled me out and gave me a hug and said, "OK- here's the deal. I am still not ready to get married and I don't know when I will be. I don't know when, and I don't know where. . . but I do know who." Then he got on his knee and gave me a ring that said "For Time and all Eternity" and asked if I would marry him. I said yes, and had to go home and explain to my boyfriend why we had to break up- awkward!!A month later he took me to the same spot and gave me my real ring, and told me not to get my own housing for the fall because he was ready to marry me before the semester started.